Are you a drum major? Cause I've been watching you all day.

Are you a fermata? because I'd like to hold you.

Are you the drum major stand because I would climb you all day.

Do you believe in love at first set or should I march by again?

Do you play piccalo because I bet you want a peek down below.

Do you want to see me dance with my pole?

Don't worry, I practice safe sax, and always wear a reed.

Falling out of love with you is as hard as backwards marching in circles.

Hey baby, if its not too much treble, I'd like to 'B' with you…naturally.

Hey baby, my name is Legato. You know why? Because I'm smooth.

Hey baby, what is your uniform number? Because I would love to get in those pants.

Hey girl, you make my heart drop spin.

How do you know when a drummer is knocking at your door? The knock always slows down.

How long is your baton?

I just jazzed everywhere.

I like a man in uniform... a band uniform.

I wanna make you go up an octave.

I wanna stick my reed in your mouthpiece.

I wanna tap that snare drum.

I wrote your name in the middle of a heart on the bottom of my shoe, so when my toes are up, everyone's knows about us.

I'll be at side 1, you'll be at side 2 and we'll both be dressing center.

I'll guard you with all my heart

I'll let you in my toaster

I'm too sexy for my sabre

I’m gonna make you hit a high note.

If you don't know it, don't blow it.

Is that a baton in your pocket or are you happy to see me?

Is that a color guard uniform you are wearing? I think its hot.

It's saxy time.

Let’s go into the practice room and work on our tonguing.

Long, loud and lubricated.

Looking good in those tight spandex.

Maybe we can have a sectional time..just the two of us.

My G-string just broke, can I borrow yours?

My instructor says I have a great blow technique.

My tuba? Yeah….it takes a strong tongue and soft lips to make this kind of music.

Nice brass

One day, you and I will be as close as Tom Wallace and marching band music.

Pull out or push it in more.

Sabres Soar, Rifles Rule, Flags are always high, you are a diva in training.

Show me your tan lines, I will show you mine.

That's a nice grand staff you have.

The soprano, not being smart enough to use birth control, says to her saxophophonist lover, "Honey, I think you better pull out now." He replies, "Why? Am I sharp?"

The theme of this movement is love. Let’s develop it.

This set of drill isn't the only thing gonna leave you out of breath tonight.

Trombones can do it in 7 positions

Wanna swap mouth pieces.

We can finger, tongue and blow at the same time.

What is the dynamic range of the bass trombone? On or off.

What's the difference between a SCUD missile and a bad oboist? A bad oboist can kill you.

When you speak, its like 1000 horns all in tune.

Work that pole.

You know I have extra pillow and blanket in the guard room.

You light up my world like a picoolo lights up the sharp side of a tuner.

You make my heart dropspin

You must be on the color guard, because you make my flag rise.

You wanna see how far I can fit my mouth piece into my mouth?

You're cuter than a french composition.

You've got all parts of me standing at attention.

Your calves must ache, because you've been back-marching through my mind all day.

Your kisses hit me harder than a solid 7 catch.

Are you French-h**... for my trom-b**...?

I'll s**... for you

Band, horns up!