You look independent. Wanna join my party?

Now you don't need a p**... to vote…but you can still borrow mine.

18 year olds can exercise their rights in government and on me!

Are you a British Loyalist? Because you're making me rethink this whole "independence" thing.

Baby I'll make you see stars and stripes

Baby, you're a firework.

Because of my rights related to eminent domain, you have to compensate me for stealing my heart.

Can I, like, annex you?

Girl, you're so beautiful. I'd cross the Delaware River to be with you. Or even the Raritan River.

Hey baby, are you ready for your trial? I'm afraid it has to be a speedy one.

Hey the alcohol's back! Now let's get drunk and screw.

I actually wrote 'the British are coming.' Well, I didn't write it per say, but I did say it once to one of my friends. And, it was pretty loud, so there's a good chance Revere heard it. So, I pretty much wrote it. Anyway, want to make out?

I believe all lady parts deserve equal representation

I don't normally like girls who wear red coats. But, for you I'll make an exception.

I had baked beans last night, it was not a pretty scene in my bathroom. Talk about the Boston massacre! Anyway, want to make out?

I have a district that has been underrepresented in Congress with you, but the 23rd Amendment now says I need to be let in.

I hope we stay together forever. Let's knock on wood. Here, use my teeth!

I will go full-term in your oval office

I wish I were the Speaker of the House and you the President Pro Temp of the Senate so I could be above you in the “order of succession.”

I'd start a revolution for your number.

I'd try to give you a fair trial but you have no peers.

I'll have you exercising your right to free speech all night long

I'll put my John Hancock on your bar tab if you hang out with me for a while.

I'm a man without a country. Can I be a citizen of you?

I'm arresting you for breaking the 8th amendment because you...are excessively fine!

I'm glad there's freedom of religion because I worship you.

I'm like fireworks: smokin', fun, and illegal in many states. Also, there are some really creepy billboards about me on the interstate.

I'm not a fan of Parliament. Unless, it's the band Parliament Funkadelic. Which doesn't mean anything to you right now, but you'll see what I'm talking about in a few hundred years. I'm from the future!

If you can tell me the difference between Flag Day and the 4th of July, I will buy you a drink. If you can't tell me the difference between Flag Day and the 4th of July, I will also buy you a drink.

If you declare me sovereign of your pants I promise I can do no wrong.

If you're incapacitated can I have a list of you next 3 hottest friends?

Is that a banana in your pocket, or you just... carrying a musket because of the Quartering Act.

It's big, like my signature.

Let me press myself against you, you can't stop me…it's my constitutional right.

Let' put the screw back in screwdriver.

Let's be like the original thirteen colonies AND MULTIPLY.

Let's do it in Philadelphia.

Let's drink beer and play with fireworks until somebody has a terrible accident!

Let's say we go back to my place. You put on a wig, I'll call you 'Tory.'

My last girlfriend and I had to call it off. I looked her right in the face and declared myself independent. Also, she was British. Want to make out?

No taxation without representation! But, there is a kiss tax. Strictly enforced and right on the lips.

Oh say can you see... me in your bed tonight

On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight?

Oooooh say can you seeeeeeee / by the dawn's early light / me in your bed / with last night's sweat still gleaminnnnnng.

Pretend you are the constitution and call me daddy

Sir William Howe... are you doing?

Tell me, does the carpet match the powdered wig?

The Constitution limits the powers of the government but the powers of my pants are unlimited!

The Continental Congress decreed 'all men are created equal.' But, they didn't say anything about 'all women being created equal.' Because girl, you are too fine!

The government gives you the right to bare your arms but I give you the right to bare everything else.

The grand jury in my pants is waiting to try you.

The inauguration of the new president may come quickly but I won't!

The only thing better than this party is the Revolutionary Party! Am I right? Also, the Tea Party was pretty cool if I'm being honest. And, I want to be honest with you.

The powers of the federal government aren't the only things that need separated.

The verdict is in; you are hot

There's too much power in my pants that needs to be balanced. Will you help me release it?

They call my bedroom the 14th colony.

They can prohibit my alcohol, you intoxicate me enough.

Thomas Jefferson would have wanted this.

Tonight I will be exercising my freedom of assembly…outside your bedroom window.

Wanna get naked and watch 1776 (that musical about the signing of The Declaration of Independence)?

We have a lot of chemistry. Right now, we're both working on a little something I like to call 'electricity.'

We'll have a balance on powers. You can be on top.

When we get back to my place I'm going to do everything to you that your government can't.

Whooo! Party like it's 1933!!!!

You be Yankee Doodle, I'll be the pony.

You can be my mate but we won't be doing any running.