The Pick Up Lines

Hot pickup lines for girls or guys at Tinder and chat

Top 50 Shit Pick Up lines

Following is our collection of smooth and dirty Shit pick up lines and openingszinnen working better than reddit. Include killer Omegle conversation starters and useful chat up lines and comebacks for situations when you are burned, guaranteed to work best as Tinder openers.

  1. I wish you were a septic tank,

    Cause I want to pump the shit out of you.

  2. Damn i shit my pants, can i get in yours?

  3. I’ve had 6 of these work but my go to is the eyes one

    I’ve made a complaint about you to google maps for not listing you as the best place to eat out

    i’m the chicken you’re the egg let’s see who actually comes first

    *if she has braces* glad I have the money for bail cus I wanna put my kids behind those bars

    Me: Can you yawn for me?
    Me: yeah it'll fit

    Damn baby is you name rapunzel cus I wanna pull your hair tonight

    Are you good at algebra, I was hoping you could replace my x without asking y

    *points to the ground* "I think you dropped something"
    her "what is it?"
    me " your standards hi my name is Noah”

    I would say ur beautiful but true beauty is on the inside and I haven’t been inside yet

    *if she says she’s on her period*
    A period doesnt stop anything but a sentence
    I enjoy my tuna w hot sauce

    Oh I like your outfit... but it would look better on my bedroom floor

    Only thing that should seperate our love... is latex

    Roses are okay
    violets are fine
    And so are you
    So you be the 6 and I’ll be the 9

    Can you tell me if this rag smells like chloroform?

    Yk they say eyes are the windows into the soul but yours look more like the gates of heaven how bout I get that snap

    One leg is Thanksgiving. The other is Christmas. Let’s meet between the holidays?

    Does that cake come with icing? Or do I have to ice it myself?

    Let’s role play
    You be iraq and I’ll be ummmmmm a bomber plane so I can drop my load on you

    wanna come back to my place? my couch pulls out and so do I

    *if she likes Harry Potter* Did you go to hogwarts? Cuz id love nothing more than to slitherin to your chamber of secrets

    Did you ever play for the bulls? Bc when I saw you my D rose

    The foot ball one

    *hears siren noises* you better run the cops are comin cus it’s illegal to be that hot

    Do you like chocolate cus I wanna fuck the shit outta you

    Are you my cousin, cus I wanna fuck the shit outta you

    *Random Question* cus I want you to lick my nuts

    You have summin on your face, oh wait it’s just my balls/it’s just the most beautiful smile

    *take a bite of food* this food is really good but I’d much rather be eating your ass right now

    I’m so jealous of your guts rn cause they’re inside of you and I’m not

    *just fuckin scream it* date me or I’ll burn down your house

    I’m no dentist put I sure can fill your cavities

    Are you a doughnut cus you are soft, sweet, curvy and pretty soon glazed and cream filled

  4. Babe, you smell like shit, sorry!

  5. The universe doesn't give a shit about you, but I do.

  6. I'm gonna disrupt the shit out of your technology.

  7. Damn Subaru, you Impreza the shit out of me!

  8. If you were a bird and i was a bird

    Would you fly around and shit on cars with me?

  9. Hey baby i just shit my pants

    Can i get in yours?

  10. Hey girl I just shit my pants

    Mind if I get in yours

shit pickup line
What is a Shit pickup line?

Funny shit pickup lines

Did it hurt?
When you fell from someone's ass and hit the toilet, you piece of shit

Damn girl did it hurt when you f-... Wait, are you from tennessee because you're the only 10 I s-... Uhh.. you can't spell quarantine withou-... Ah shit just take your pants off already

Are you a Stephen King novel?

Because you thick as hell and scare the shit out of me

If you were an item at an Indian restaurant, you would have three chillies next to your name...

Because you make me shit myself!

shit pickup line
This is a funny Shit pickup line!

Was your ass forged by Sauron? Cause that shit looks precious.

Are you a toilet?
Because you look like shit today.

Hey girl are you a piece of shit?

‘Cause I’d like to slide down your pants.

Are your parents assholes?

Because you're the shit.

Dang, your so hot if you ate bread you would shit toast

There it is

Damn girl, you shit with that ass?

I'm married so you know I won't be all clingy and shit!

Are you a pickle

Cause that's the funniest shit I've ever seen

shit pickup line
Working Shit tinder opener

Fucker stole my heart

Can't have shit in Detroit

Hey girl are you constipated

Because I want to fuck the shit out of you

You can call me shit, cause I wanna be all up in that ass.

I just shit my bed

Can we share yours?

Excuse me, I just shit my pants.

Can I get into yours?

Hey girl, can I sleep in your bed?

I shit in mine

Damn girl, do you eat ass?

Cause your breath smells like shit!

Hey babe, is your dad a farmer?

because I want to shit in your mouth.

Are you a massive brick wall?

Because I'd shit down the government to have you

Baby with a booty like that,

I'd follow a mile of your shit, just to see where it came from.

Roses are red. Violets are bule.

Excuse me, miss? Can I fuck the shit outta you?