Sit on my face and I’ll guess your weight

If I’m wrong I’ll eat the difference

What’s the fastest way to your heart?

Why don’t you sit on my face and let me eat my way there?

Sit on my face and i will guess your weight

And if I'm wrong

I'll eat the difference.

Roses are red, so are your lips...

You should sit on my face and wiggle those hips.

Do you wanna come sit on my lap?

We’ll talk about the first thing that pops up

Line: Want to sit on my lap and talk about the first thing that pops up?
Comeback: Well that’ll be a short conversation.

Are you a N95 mask?

Cause I want you to sit on my face till I can't breath

The tree isn't the only thing that's going to have an angel sitting on top of it tonight.

Hey do you wanna sit on my lap and see what pops up!

Pretty girls scare me shitless

With that being said, I’ve been on the toilet for 30 minutes since I saw you

Or

It took me 30 minutes of sitting on the toilet to come say hi

Hey would you like to lorem ipsum dolor sit on my lap?

Hey baby.. Whaddya say we play "Train Conductor"? You can sit on my face and I'll chew chew chew

;)

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Probably because you’d be on your knees greeting my c**....

I like breakfast in bed, so why don't you just come sit on my face?

I like to lean back while you just sit on cruse.

Roses are red, I haven't ate...

So please sit on my face, it's not up for debate

Are you sitting on the F5 key? Because your backside is refreshing.

Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Because you have a pretty sweet career objective. I like your hustle.

Hey, how about you sit on my face and let me eat my way to you heart?

Hey girl are you a bench?

Because I’d love to sit on you

Have you been sitting on a grindstone because your kiss is superior.

You know the difference between a pretty girl like yourself and a pair of sunglasses?

Sunglasses sit a little higher on my face

Roses are red, your underwear is lace, take them off and sit on my face.

Hey, you're beautiful.

Sit on my face?

What's the difference between you and a pair of sunglasses?

Sunglasses sits higher on my face

Are you an SAT exam? Because I would gladly sit in a room with you for three hours.

I’d remove all the chairs in the world, just so you have to sit on my face.

(One tall person to another) It's nice how easy it is for us to check each other out across the room. We should go sit down somewhere though so the next tallest people have a chance.

While there are so many places, The only place i love to sit is next to you️

I'd hide every chair in the world

Just for you to sit on my face

If I could, I'd get rid of all of the chairs in the world so that you'd have to sit on my face.

I wasn't expecting you sitting next to me when I was booking my ticket. Life is full of pleasant surprises.

Are you sitting on F5 button? Because your back is refreshing.

Are You a Movie ?

'Cause I can Sit down and be sure to stay till you finish...

Did you sit down in sugar?

Cause you gotta sweet ass

You wanna know the difference between you and sunglasses?

Sunglasses sit higher on my face...

Are you an SAT exam? Because I would gladly sit in a room with you for three hours. I don’t have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out?

Sit in my lap and let's talk about the first thing that pops up, or until my legs fall asleep.

Hey girl, I'm sitting in the exit row, so you know I'm willing and able...

Did you sit on a lemon cake precious? Cause you have a pretty sweet ass!

Do you come here often and sit hopelessly under the dim lights of the bar? I might just make your life even more meaningless.

Do you wanna play trains? Sit on my face while i ChooChoo.

You look tired

Do you want to sit on my face?

You could sit on my face any time, and I will let you eat all the way to your heart.

Are you sitting on a pile of sugar?

Cuz i think ur kiss is sweet

Babe, looking for a ride? You could sit on my lap all night.

Come sit on my lap. I've got a candy cane just for you.

If you ever get tired, you can sit on my face anytime.

If you are a queen, I want to be the chess board that you will sit on.

Will you help anchor my lifeguard tower by sitting on my lap?

Hey girl, can you sit on my laptop?

Did you sit in high fructose corn syrup? Because your ass is so sweet.

Do you know what's the differences between you and glasses? My glasses sit higher on my face.

Girl, call me a test. Because I want you to study me, sit on me, and do me hard.

When your hands are cold you sit on them. You know my face is pretty cold.

Come sit on my knee, and play with Santa.

Are you sitting on the F5 key?

Because that kiss is refreshing...

If you and I were little frogs. We could sit on leaves together.

Someone s**... my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit.

So I saw this really gorgeous girl sitting on the city bench with a bunch of bags and she got up to start walking, when I ran up to her and said

"Hey you dropped something!"
to which she replied "What?"
and I said "Your standards. Hi my name's Matt, wanna go out sometime?"

Babe you got a sweet ass, and you need to sit on my lap because I got sweet candy cane to match.

Are your legs tired? Sit on my laps and take a rest.

Mind if I sit down because your beauty is making me dizzy.

Babe, if you get tired from dancing, you could always sit on my lap.

Did you sit in high fructose corn syrup?

Because your kiss is so sweet my body can't tell when it has had enough.

Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Cause you have a pretty sweet butt.

Hey baby, I want you to sit on my face and let me eat my way out.

Are you an exam? Because I want to study you all night long and sit through you.

What’s the difference between me and your couch? I feel better to sit on.

Guess what, I can tell how much you weigh. Only if you sit on top of me.

Are you sitting on the F5 key, because that kiss is refreshing.

I tried this on some local elementary school students last week but they didn't seem to understand it.

Sit on my face

And I’ll eat my way to your heart.

I may not be Santa but you can sit on my lap any day other than Christmas.

Did you sit in sugar? Because you have a pretty sweet ass.

What’s the difference between you and a pair of glasses?

My glasses would sit a bit higher on my face...

Ukw? I can watch a movie made entirely of your cute pics, maybe 50+ hours long, in one sitting without getting bored.

Are you glasses, cuz I'd love if you would sit on my face all day.

I am feeling warm

Is it the thermostat or You just sitting beside me

Anyone can sit here and buy your drinks. I will buy you a full course meal instead.

Girl, sit on my head, i'll boost you.

People tell me I've got b**... resting face

If you agree, you can sit right here.

Babe, sit on my lap and see what I have under wraps.

Are you a bird?

Because you can sit on my stick tonight with seeds in your mouth.

"If you're tired of sitting on those uncomfortable chairs, my face promises a cushioned and more pleasurable perch."

Call me Pinocchio, because you can sit on my face and I'll tell you lies.

Well, I do take my training seriously. Just finished learning how to fetch snacks on command. What's next, sit or roll over?

"Are you a chair? Because every time you walk by, I'm floored by how well you support my sitting jokes."

"I've heard chairs can be tough, how about taking a comfortable seat on my smile instead?"

"I know seats can be a bit rough, but my face promises the softest comfort for such a stunning beauty."

You must be an expert in physical touch, because every time you sit on my lap, I melt!

"Is it just me or did the room get brighter when I found you in this charming corner?"

"I've watched the horizon glow with life, but it pales compared to the luminance in your eyes."

"Did you sit on a pile of sugar? Because you've got a pretty sweet personality and it's irresistibly attractive!"

Do you have a map? Because when you sit on my face, I get lost in your beauty!

"Are you the ocean? Because every time I see you, I feel a wave of happiness that just doesn't shore up."

"Is your name Luna? Because I'm always drawn to you, just like I am to the moon at night."

"I admit, I was a lousy writer, Kaylee. But can I rewrite our story?"

"You sitting on me is a dream, because every king needs his breathtaking queen on his throne."

Do you have a name, or can I call you mine? Let's sit down and give those tired feet a break.

"Roses are red, violets sit in dew, but none of them hold a candle to you."

Are you a chef? Because every time you cook for me, my heart melts with your love.

"Is your ass a library book? Because I can't stop checking it out, but I promise I'll return it on time."

As your vampire boyfriend, it would be my pleasure to carry you and have you sit on my lap whenever you wish. I can't resist you.

"As we sit under the moon, your eyes hold such delight, crafting stories of love that rival the starry night."

"Excuse me, but that corporate skirt isn’t the only thing that looks great in this office—your smile lights up the room."

Did you sit in sugar? Because you have a sweet tush in those jeans.

"Chairs might be uncomfortable darling, ever thought of sitting on something more pleasing? Like my face, perhaps?"

"Excuse me, miss, but this chair isn't as comfortable without having a charming conversation with you."

"You've been standing too long, gorgeous. Why not rest on something more comfortable - like my face?"

Are you made of sugar? Because every time you sit on my face, I lose my voice!

"Have you been sitting on a rainbow? Because your beauty is more captivating than any treasure I've ever seen."

"Kaylee, we're like a classic novel--we had a rough chapter, but isn't the redemption part always the best?"

"If I were a prince, you'd be the magical witch who captured my heart in this beautiful field."

Are you made of sugar? Because I can't resist the sweetness of your smile sitting on my face.

Age? Pfft, I don't count the years, I count the experiences... and the number of pizza slices I can eat in one sitting. 🍕

"Are you sitting on the F5 key? Because that distance refreshes my need to meet you, despite those 10000km."

Know what my couch I have in common?

We both eat anything that sits on us.

"In the moon's soft glow, you shine brighter still, would you share its light with me, if you will?"

"Don't settle for an uncomfortable chair, beautiful. My face could offer you the softest seat in the house."

Call me a sit down restaurant, because babe I will fill you up tonight.

"Forget about those hard chairs, darling. My face promises a seat far more comfortable and pleasure-filled."

"Babe, why endure chair discomfort? My face offers a softer, warmer and much more satisfying alternative."

"Well, I promise there won't be any tantrums, only lots of fun and adventure. Ready for a playful ride?"

Babe I'll treat you like my home work. f**... you and sit on you all night, and come at the last minute.

"Forget those uncomfortable chairs, sweetie. My face promises both comfort and an unforgettable ride."

"Did you know chairs can be such a pain? How about you ditch the discomfort and find solace on my face?"

"Just sitting here, admiring how your 'nothing' outshines everyone else's 'something'. Care to make my evening exciting?"

Did you sit on a lemon cake? Cause you have a pretty sweet ass!

"Chairs really don't do justice to your beauty. Would you prefer my face for a more comfy and appreciative seat?"

"Who needs a chair when you've got my face? Your allure deserves the best seat in the house."

Sit on my lap and I will take you to a whole new level.