Top 50 Figured Pick Up lines

Following is our collection of smooth and dirty Figured pick up lines and openingszinnen working better than reddit. Include killer Omegle conversation starters and useful chat up lines and comebacks for situations when you are burned, guaranteed to work best as Tinder openers.

If you were Pokemon, what type would you be?

\*after hearing his/her answer\*

Really? I kinda figured you'd be my type.
Excuse me, how many hours of sleep do you get at night? 20?

I'm trying to figure out how much beauty sleep one needs to look that good
Sure you can figure 8, but can you follow through?
I like a full figured girl.
Are you a figure skater? Because your figure is out of this world.
If I was a vampire, I'd pick you as my puzzle and spend a lifetime to try and figure you out.
Girl, are you the Merovingian because I cannot figure out what you're even doing here.
Sorry it took me so long to message you.

I was at Whole Foods trying to figure out what you like for breakfast.
My phone is Light

*>Goes up to a lady and holds out my phone to her "Would you mind holding this for a second?"*
\>Lady takes the phone for a moment
\>A*sks "Does my phone feel light to you"*

\>Lady responds "I guess?"
\>T*akes the phone back "I knew it it's been feeling light all day, and I just can't figure out out"*
\>O*pens up the contacts list and browses through it, when a sudden look of shock is on my face "I figured it out!"*
\>Lady goes "What?"

*>Says as I hold the phone out to her again "It's missing your number"*
I know my math, and you’ve got one significant figure.

Funny figured pickup lines

Are you an ice skater, cuz damn what a figure you’ve got!

I'm good at algebra.

I can replace your X and you wouldn't need to figure out Y.

Me: “can I buy you a rink?”

Girl: “you mean a drink?”

Me: “I figured I’d give you the D later”

Because of [insert a Republican political figure] leadership, we are strong; because of his vision, we will be even stronger; and because I can't stop thinking about your ass, I haven't been able to stand up for the last half hour.

My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet Im happy. I cant figure it out. What am I doing right? (Charles Schulz)

I'm sorry it's taken me this long to figure it out, but I promise I'm done making a fool of myself.

This dude

So I work at a medium clothing store chain in a mall. And I'm just getting on break and a customer loudly says to this chick who I don't think even knew him:

"Damn gurl, if I worked in a grocery store, your ass would be the receiving, and I'd be the freight truck coming inside."

I was a bit surprised to see the volume used as everyone was looking around confused, as well as me. I went on my lunch really trying to figure out what the hell just happened. But then again, I applaud this man for his creativity. That was pretty good if you ask me.

Allow me to buy you a drink. After all, thanks to our beloved [insert a Republican political figure], the economy has never been better!

Hey girl am I the government? because I would like to have lots of "net taxes".

U have my respect if u figure it out. Good luck

Hey baby, you like motorcycles

No, huh figures, probably why you are in a wheelchair

Do you know of any museums around here?

I figured you might know, since you're a work of art.

Are you a decent father figure

Because you're unreal

Are you a civil rights attorney?

Because the figure you've presented is inflammatory and prejudicial, and I find it difficult to believe.

My friend made a joke

We were in the hall and he said “you’re as straight as a twig” a few seconds pass and I tell this one really attractive girl “is that a twig in my pants or am I just happy to see you?” figured it fit here

You know, I can't figure out which taste I wanna know more about,

Your music, or your lips.

So here's something that i thought of and hi, i'm new here!

So, there was a thought about a few days ago which i figured could possibly work as a pick-up line if changed a bit, as for that thought/possible pick-up line if changed a bit, here it is:

"Regular" version: "Isn't mascara, ear-rings lipstick and the like kind of dumb/stupid/unnecessary?

"Pick-up line" version: "Don't you think that mascara, ear-rings, lipstick and the like is kind of dumb/stupid/unnecessary?
"As for why i think so it's because it just messes with your skin and i don't think there's any reason as to why you should mess with perfection so i can't understand why you have **insert whichever one/ones of mascara, ear-rings, lipstick and the like that the person has on here** on.

Do you like subway?

Cuz i figured that you want my foot long

Do you like a bargin (For Women) NSFW

Would you like to five figure dis(cunt).

Hey girl, you Italian?

Y’all figure out the rest...

Hey, girl do you have hypnothighs,

Because one look at you and I'm under your command.

Idk if this is good it just came to me when I was driving and I figured I'd post it here to see what people think.

Did you figure out what you're wearing to the Christmas party?

Because you can wear me out!

Can't figure out the meaning

What the hell does " the letter X scares me cuz I never wanna be yours" mean?

I need to call Haddaway!

Because I just figured out what love is ;)