Are you flappy bird? Cause I could tap you all night.

I wanna go inside your wine cabinet and pull myself out a stiff one.

Nice shoes, wanna f**k?

Nice f**king weather. Want to?

They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what that p*ssy needs.

You should stop drinking, because you're driving me home!

Do you like apples? [Yes/No] How about I take you home and f**k the sh*t out of you. How do like them apples?

Would you like to actively engage in mock procreation?

Hey babe, how about a pizza and a f**k? [No] What's wrong, don't you like pizza?

"Do you like cherries?" [No.] "Ok, can I have yours?"

Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room across the street.

I have a rare disease that will kill me unless I have kiss within the next 30 minutes.

Do you like Pizza Hut? Cause I'll stuff your crust.

Smile. It is the second best thing you can do with your lips.

Your clothes are making me uncomfortable; please take them off.

Before I hit on you, do you have a problem with large genitalia?

Do you like whales? Cause we can go h**... back at my place.

Do you like Kellogg’s? Cause I wanna Frost your Flakes.

Call me leaves, cause you should be blowing me.

I'm no good at pick up lines, but I can pick you up and you will feel my line.

The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to f**k you on the floor.

Do you have an Asian passport? Because I'm China get into your Japantees

Now that Trump is president, our country surely is s**...... and you can be too!

If the sun were to stop shining, I'd be your source of vitamin D.

How much will $20 get me?

I wanna paint you green and spank you like a disobedient avocado.

You’re so hot I could roast my meat on you, baby.

Do you believe in free love? [No] Then how much do you cost?

Your shirt has to go, but you can stay.

Call me Chris Brown, cause I’d hit that!

So are you ready to meet my parents?

Are you an elevator? Cause I wanna go down on you.

Do you like Ramen Noodles? Cuz I'll be Rammin' my noodle in you later.

We're going to dance to one song, then go back to my apartment and f**k.

I'm bigger and better than the Titantic - only 200 women went down on that vessel!

If I were a Nintendo cartridge would you blow me?

What is a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?

Are you a doctor? cause you just cured my erectile dysfunction.

Hi, wanna f**k? [No] Mind lying down while I do?

You must be Jelly, cause jam don’t shake like that.

Pizza is my second favourite thing to eat in bed.

Are those jeans Guess? Cause guess who wants to be inside them...

Do you need a stud in your life? Cause I got the STD and all I need is U.

I hope to God you can't sing because I just wanna f**k you.

It's not just going to s**... itself.

Don't let me die! I bet my tongue can beat up your tongue.

Are you the SAT? Cause I’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes, with a ten minute break in the middle for snacks.

Want me to put some words in your mouth??

You remind me of my little toe... because I'm going to kiss you on every piece of furniture in my home.

Oh you got a boyfriend? Perfect he can make us breakfast in the morning.

Will you be my girlfrien? I left out the 'd' cause you'll get that later!

Are you a farmer? Because you’ve got some big, round, beautiful melons!

What are you doing tonight? Besides me, of course?

You look so good, I could just eat you up.

Do you go to church often? Cause you're gonna be on your knees tonight.

My name is Haywood. Haywood Jablome.

"Do you have a map? Because I've been following you all night, and I like where it’s leading."

"Are you a photographer? Because every time I see you, I picture us together in a very steamy setting."

"I have this magic watch that can actually talk to me. Seriously, it's saying something right now. It says that you're not wearing any underwear, is that true?." [No.] "Oh wait, my watch is an hour fast!

Are you my homework? Cause I'm not doing you but I definitely should be.

"Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for, and I can't help but keep scrolling."

"Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes while I 'casually' check out your photos."

You remind me of a crop, because I wanna plow you.

"Not sure if it's creepy, but I'm mesmerized by your allure. Can this humble beast accompany his enchanting beauty?"

"You must be a rare book, because I can't help but want to stalk every chapter of your story."

"Are you a magician? Because every time I stalk your profile, everyone else disappears—especially when I see that smile!"

"Is your name Google? Because you’ve got everything I've been searching for—especially when I watch you from afar."

Want to spend the night at my house tonight? The couch may not pull out, but I do.

"Are you a blanket? Because your charm is warming up my night."

Are you a teddy bear? Because I want to hug you all night, but not in a creepy way.

"Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by your window again to make it happen?"

"Your smile lights up any room, just like stars do in the night. Can I be the moon to your starry sky?"

"I must be a photographer because I can picture us tangled up together, you looking irresistible in every shot."

"Do you believe in love at first fright, or should I show you my collection of creepy dolls?"

Why pay $5 at Subway when you can get this footlong for free?

Do you smoke p**...? Because...

w**... look cute together.

Hey baby, I'll f**k you so well, the NEIGHBORS will be having a cigarette when we're done.

"Are you a magician? Because every time I see you, everyone else disappears from my creepy radar."

"Do you believe in love at first fright, or should I walk by your spooky collection again?"

If you thought Disneyland was the happiest place on earth, you haven’t been in my pants yet!

"Home safe! Basically broke world records avoiding creepy night crawlers...I'm talking about bugs, not zombies."

"Are you a map? Because I can't help but get lost in your eyes, even from a distance."

"Is your favorite ghost Casper? Because you've got me floating on air and feeling all warm and fuzzy!"

You’re the type of girl I’d let sit on my face for a long period of time.

Touch your toes and I'll show you where the rocket goes!

Hi, I'm gay. Do you think you can convert me?

I only have 12 hours to live... please don't let me die a virgin.

"Are you a magician? Because every time I stalk your profile, everyone else disappears and you're all I see."

"Are you Laughing Jack? Because every time I see you, my heart starts performing its own creepy-carnival acrobatics!"

"I'm not staring, just lost in the beauty of your eyes. If you're the beauty, can I be your beast?"

My mattress is a little hard. Would you like to help me break it in?

"I must be a detective, because I can't help but find myself intrigued by every little detail about you."

"Are you a haunted house? Because I can’t help but feel drawn to your creepy charm!"

"Do you believe in ghosts? Because I’m feeling a spooky connection that’s hauntingly hard to ignore!"

" Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears... especially the creepy guy over there."

I think that pick-up lines are for people with to much time on their hands. Let's just f**k.

"Is it just me, or do we have some serious chemistry? Because I can’t stop ‘following’ your vibe… in every way."

"Are you a Legend of Zelda quest? Because your beauty is an adventure I'd brave any creepy pasta for."

You know, my lips won’t just kiss themselves.

You wanna go out this weekend? [Sorry, I have a boyfriend] I have a math test tomorrow [What?] Oh, I thought we were talking about things we could both cheat on!

I wish I was cross eyed, so I could see two of you.

"Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again and let you admire the view?"

Do you know your ABC's? Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet.

"Are you a magician? Because every time I watch you, everyone else disappears and my heart races."

"Is your name Google? Because you have everything I've been searching for, even in my most 'creepy' moments."

"Do you believe in love at first fright, or should I creep up on you again?"

"Like Ben Drowned in Majora's Mask, I'm drowning in the sea of your eyes, minus the creepy meme part!"

"Are you a magician? Because every time I see you, everyone else disappears—especially when I'm stalking your stunning photos."

"Are you a haunted house? Because my heart races every time I think about exploring your spooky secrets!"

"Do you have a map? Because I just got lost in your eyes... and I'm not coming back."

"Are you a magician? Because whenever I see you, everyone else disappears, and my heart starts doing tricks!"

Are you a shark? Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.

"Do you believe in ghosts? Because I'm falling for you faster than a spirit in an abandoned mansion!"

"If beauty were a crime, you'd be serving a life sentence, and I’d happily be your devoted stalker."

"Can I follow you home? Not to sound creepy, but my parents always told me to follow my dreams."

Do you work at Home Depot? Because you’re giving me wood.

Wanna go bowling? I’ll give you a chance to pin me.

"Are you a magician? Because every time I look at you, everyone else disappears—just like my stalking habits!"

You can’t be my first, but you could be my next.

"Is your sister a zombie? Because I'm dying to meet her after seeing how cool you are!"

Are those space pants?

Cuz your kiss is out of this world!

My friend over there really wants your number so he knows where to get a hold of me in the morning.

Could I touch your belly button... from the inside?

What Actually Works

Just say you think she's cute and ask for her number lol. Don't be creepy.

Were you on Baywatch?

Cause I've been watching you, bae.

Creepy one.

Are you from Iraq? 'Cause I like the way you Baghdad kiss up.

You remind me of my cousin. I want to kiss you so bad, but I know that I can't.

Could you do me a favor? Could you get on your knees and smile like a donut?

Is your name Nancy? Because I’m going to take creepy pictures of you from a distance while you’re in your room.

Is there a non-creepy way to hit on your waiter? If so, please text it to me.

I can't believe I haven't seen you in 8 years. You don't look a day over 15. Wait, is that creepy? (High School Acquaintance)